The change was subtle and I’m not
exactly sure how it happened. Maybe, I couldn’t find the pen I was looking for
and grabbed a pencil instead. Maybe it’s because I loved the brightly colored
cases of the mechanical pencils. But over time, I moved from using a pen for
making notes or underlining to using a pencil. As the years have gone on,
those pencil notations have become a bit faded.
I told myself Laura Ingalls Wilder wrote all her manuscripts in pencil on a nickel tablet. But when I saw the manuscript in Mansfield, Missouri, if I'm honest, I wished she'd written in ink. It would have been easier to read.
I’ve wondered if there wasn't an underlying reason I switched to pencil. Writing in pencil always leaves the possibility of erasure. Just in case. Nothing permanent—a little holding back. Was I doing this in my life, too?
I believe God
would have us live in ink. Fully committed and not holding back.
Proverbs
16:3 comes to mind. “Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish
your plans.”
Interesting
thing about that word commit. In the original language it has the meaning to
roll or roll away. Committing means to roll away onto the Lord what we do.
Here’s the
verse in the amplified. “Roll your works upon the Lord [commit and trust them
wholly to Him; He will cause your thoughts to become agreeable to His will, and]
so shall your plans be established and succeed.”
For me, living
in pencil means I’m trying to make it work out myself. Living in ink means I’m rolling
everything over onto the Lord and trusting He will work it out. It takes more
courage to live in ink. But along with facing our fear comes infinite possibilities,
because we trust in an infinite God.
I’m gathering all the pencils together and replacing them with pens—at my desk, by my bed, in my purse, and near the sofa where I have my time with the Lord every morning.
It’s my way of saying I’m all in for trusting God with every word I
write.
Beverly Varnado is the author of several small town romances from Anaiah Press including her latest, A Season for Everything. All are available at Amazon. A memoir, Faith in the Fashion District, from Crosslink Publishing is also available as well as her other books, Give My Love to the Chestnut Trees and Home to Currahee. She also has an Etsy Shop, Beverly Varnado Art.
To explore the web version of One Ringing Bell, please visit bev-oneringingbell.blogspot.com
Beverly Varnado copyright 2022