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| Photo Credit Aaron Varnado |
One of the
discussion questions you’ll find in my book, In Search of the Painted
Bunting, is “Why is it hard to stop judging people?”
My main
character, Cornelia, really has an issue with this. It almost seems like she
can’t help herself. Like when Paul said, “For I have the desire to do what is
good, but I cannot carry it out. For I do not do the good I want to do, but the
evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing” (Romans 7:18-19).
Oh, yes.
I think we’ve all
lived that verse out. The reason it’s hard to stop judging is we don’t have the
power to do this apart from the grace of God in Jesus. We often forget that
when others receive the scorn of our judgment, they sense God feels that way
about them as well. Instead of helping others to find God, we push them away.
So here are three
suggestions to help keep us from being judgmental toward others.
Pray about it.
Ask the Lord to give us His heart towards another and allow His grace to reach
out to others through us.
Realize we don’t
have all the facts. Sometimes, we give a sideways glance
to someone, and we don’t have a clue what they’re going through. In fact, if we
were put in their shoes, we might not do as well as they’re doing. We need to
remember we only see in part.
Remember that it
is only by the grace and mercy of God that we are in right standing with the
Lord. Proverbs 9:10 reads, “The fear of the Lord is
the beginning of wisdom . . .” A conscious walking in the fear of the Lord
keeps us from making harsh judgments toward others because we realize that but
for the grace of God, we too could be in that situation.
I recently had
the opportunity to speak with someone who was dealing with many difficulties,
and this person had dared to put themselves in an environment where there was a
potential for them to be judged. But they weren’t. Instead, they received the love
of the Lord which left them with hope and seeking the Lord even more.
I know in my own
life, it has been those who offered compassion rather than judgement that
helped me the most. And when we feel judged, there’s a natural tendency to want
to hide, but if we hold our heads up and continue with our lives in the grace
of God despite the disparagement of others, we may give others inspiration to
do the same.
So, here we go, calling
on the Lord to help us do what we can’t do ourselves. May his mercy flow.