Through tears, I watched the news coverage of Dr. Charles Stanley’s passing. Oh, what a saint of God!! One young commentator who had watched Dr. Stanley’s messages with his grandmother when he was a youth growing up in Pennsylvania said, “We all have our stories about Dr. Stanley.”
Yes,
we do.
And
here’s mine.
After
my full surrender to the Lord over forty years ago, I still struggled with a
crooked way of thinking about God and myself. To quote a friend who knew the
details, she once wrote, “You have misconceptions about God which have lead to
false guilt, fear, and feelings of condemnation.” I had a performance-based perspective
about God’s love for me. I offered myself hardly any grace.
And
these thoughts were about to break me because you see in my world, I had to be
perfect. And I hadn’t been and never would be. Who can? Needless to say, I lived
in fear. Add to that buried trauma from the past.
For
a year in the late eighties, God put me in a spiritual school to deal with this.
Dr.
Stanley’s role in helping me with this began one night in October as I turned
on the radio when he was speaking on having an unforgiving spirit toward
ourselves. He said we have to forgive ourselves. In my journal I wrote that I sensed God
saying “Beverly, this is for you. Believe it!” Dr. Stanley went on to say that
If I can’t forgive myself, how can I accept God’s forgiveness. Do I think I
know something God doesn’t know? What I’m doing is telling God what He said is
not true. When I say “I deserve . . . “ for past sins, it is from the enemy.
Satan will try to convince us we’re getting off scot-free, but Jesus paid the
price. “Grace is unmerited, undeserved, unnegotiable, and a gift from God,” Dr.
Stanley taught.
Later,
in another message he said our performance does not save us. I would have told
you that I didn’t believe my performance saved me but that it was the grace of God. I knew that was the right thing to say. But the way I lived was I couldn’t
mess up or God would toss me. One night I turned on the car radio after a late
night at work. This moment is crystallized in my mind because I was struggling
so much, and the words Dr. Stanley spoke came right from Gods heart. He spoke
powerfully about God’s unfailing love, how we are sealed by the Holy Spirit,
and that we belong to Him.
I
went on to read Dr. Stanley’s book on forgiveness, which I wish I still had but
lent to someone years ago.
At
this point, the needle started to move. I later made a list of all the
significant words God gave me over the course of that year and I can see a
change in my journal entries when I began to receive these words from Dr.
Stanley.
In
Isaiah 40:4, the prophet in foretelling Jesus’ coming said in part, “. . . the
crooked shall be made straight.”
After
my surrender to Him, God wanted to set my crookedness straight. He allowed circumstances
in my life which would force me to deal with the issue. But at the same time,
he sent His word, teachers, and preachers to speak to my heart. One of them was
Dr. Charles Stanley who God used to set crooked ways straight in so many. I came out of this time a changed person, and I will
forever be grateful to Dr. Stanley for all he did for me through his ministry.
I
know he is rejoicing with the angels, now. May his work here on earth continue
to bring a harvest of salvation, hope, and healing to many.